This post is full of slippery slope and hyperbole, and should only be read at an hour of the day when your intelligence is peaking.
I've been thinking, and can't believe it has taken me this long to post about this when I should have gotten right to it on doom's day, May 24...the day kendall proposed and the day our lives of blogging became mass confusion. I don't know how many of you have actually taken into consideration that mal is becoming a part of the family in two days, therefore presenting the problem that our blog can no longer be named the 9 green beans.
"Who cares?", you say.
But in reality the Green family's identity is about to change forever. You think people will still read our blog 'ir'regardless (refer to cousin bree's blog) of how many of us there are? We are lying to the entire American blogging population. Do we actually want to be known for only having 9 people in our family for the rest of our infinite existence?!?! I don't think so...We are lying to the many amiable people who just want to check up on our family.
It's like the boy who cried wolf.
Kendall gets married, we don't change it, then the day comes when Beau and Jordan get married, we don't change it and it still remains a lie the day I kneel at the alter. So we finally decide to change the name. Then who knows? Who really knows! Because our entire family identity casts a shadow of only nine people, and the newest members go unnoticed.
So what do we do about this problem you may ask? Do we throw someone out? Axel? Make it adults only? No, because he was even here before mal was so he would grow up and be super offended. Then he might become a rebel and fulfill cort's fear of becoming gay. Let's not even go there. But honestly, the first word of the green family blog is nine. And in two days that number will be irrelevant.
It's a risky move though, changing the name, then people might not know who we are and when they try to go to the 9 green beans blog and are faced with the ever-terrible words "Cannot be displayed" in big red letters across the top of their screens. Then they'll think something drastic has happened and they won't know what to do. The whole family has vanished along with their blog. Can you imagine? The trauma.
So I approach you with this ultimatum. Would you rather people hate us for lying to them about the number of people in our family, or people hate us because they get all confused trying to access our blog?
Do we really want to go through with this wedding.